How I Got Out of a Messy Love Triangle
By Rebecca, age 20, Wisconsin
Yes, I know that it's hard to follow what the heart believes is right when the mind tries to convince you otherwise. These last few weeks this has been my battle, not with anyone, but with my own self. It has been an emotional roller coaster, an internal battle. It's been hard, but through it I've learned that it's not always easy dealing with certain things. In this short period of time I've experienced what many do over long periods of time. I've been caught in the middle of a love triangle that I never asked for. It was something I never expected. It just came along slowly, creeping along like a spider spinning its web, only to catch its prey.
I'm a person like many - very social and very outgoing - so it's never been hard for me to make friends. I have one friend who goes beyond simply being a friend - he's more along the lines of a brother. So my relationship with him is very close. In being my best friend, there's no secret, nothing we don't know about each other.
Two months ago he started dating my female best friend, something I always knew would happen, though the idea never bothered me. But problems began to arise due to my being so close to him, jealousy becoming the main factor. My best friend lost trust in me because she thought I wanted to take him from her, though that was far from reality. I had two best friends, each demanding different things from me, but if I gave one more time than the other it created a problem. I didn't know what to do anymore to make it seem right and not let something innocent look so wrong. On top of this I had my own love life to deal with which was also getting caught up in this love triangle. I say this because my guy was my guy friend's best friend. I know it may seem confusing, but it only made matters worse. Just imagine ... we all knew each other, which made what happened next all the harder.
My guy friend called me one day with important news. He always called me so it didn't seem weird to me, but the urgency had me thinking. As I picked up the phone and asked him what was up, chills ran down my spine, because somehow I knew what it was he wanted to tell me. I began avoiding whatever it was he wanted to tell me, but then, in the middle of a random comment, he shouted out something I didn't want to hear. He shouted he loved me and that he couldn't hide it anymore. My face dropped and my body stiffened. At this moment only one thought ran through my head ... Why me??
A million thoughts then ran wild, like a printer printing a thousand sheets per minute. I didn't know how to process this. I wondered what was going to happen with his girlfriend and the guy I was dating. At the same time my heart was pounding so hard because I wanted to shout it back. I wanted to tell him what I was feeling, but my mind kept telling me to reason. There was so much at stake. If I told him how I felt, two people would be hurt and would possibly hate me. That idea, I couldn't bear it. For the next few weeks I wandered around thinking of accepting the truth and talking, but I was scared.
Time has gone by and I stand firm in my decision today. I'm actually glad about the decision I made. I was not going to be happy over the pain of others, especially people I cared about so much. I told him that if he really loved me he would accept only being my friend, and if not he had to separate himself from me. It wasn't easy, but it was for the best. Sometimes the thing that's the hardest for us to do is the best thing to do. It may not sound logical, but that's how it is. The best things in life come with sacrifice. Nothing falls into our hands without work.
My life after the storm makes sense again because I live without guilt. And him? Well, let's just say he's still with her. Need I say more? Maybe in the end he confused his love for me, and now he has realized it would have been a mistake to let go of two people who genuinely do love us, all for a feeling that may have just been simple confusion.
Maybe in other situations this would not have been what happened, but in mine it was. In the end I kept my brother and my best friend, and I have a great guy in my life who values and loves me in an unimaginable way. Couldn't ask for more!!
So girls, I leave with this: not everything that shines is gold. If something is meant for you, hey, it'll make its way back. Life is too short to be sad or caught up in heartbreak. Let love find you and you'll experience what love is really supposed to be. It should never, ever be founded on anyone's pain. Love will find a way ... always!!!
