Never Been Kissed

By Elizabeth, age 20, Pennsylvania

Editor's Note: Our newest Real Life/Advice columnist Elizabeth, with advice for those of us who feel like, when it comes to relationships, we're missing the party.

Busi writes:

Well, I am a 15 year old girl who has never had a boyfriend! Like, never even gone on a date, had a guy flirt with me, kiss a guy, etc. Like, NO GUYS in my life AT ALL! And the worst part is...I go to a co-ed school, and have been for my whole life.

What is wrong with me? I mean, it kind of hurts or feels weird when I give my friends relationship advice when I have never been in one. It's like I am missing out on life.

I mean, I get so shy when I am around boys and I have had tons of crushes whom I saw as potential boyfriends, but they never like me back.

What should I do? I mean, all my friends say I am a nice person - what more do guys want?

I am not saying I want just any guy, but I want guys to notice me for who I am.

Dear Busi,

I'm glad I received your question. Reading throughout your question made me realize how similar your life is to the way I used to be at the age of 15...exactly.

* Went to a co-ed school my whole life
* Shy around guys
* Gave advice to friends about relationships but was not in one
* Never dated
* Never kissed a guy
* Was a nice person
* Felt like a reject

First, boys at that age are complex. They don't know what they want in a way. What most boys look for is a physical attraction and a girl who will go all the way. Most importantly, don't change who you are in order to have a guy like you, because at the end of the day it isn't worth it. Be yourself and don't follow the crowd. Don't be afraid to speak out for yourself.

The biggest mistake I made was having a friend set me up. She was a good friend, but had a bad reputation, so you might know where this is going. I lost my "innocence" to a guy I met three times. I regret the fact that I didn't take my time to find someone I could trust, who respected my body, soul, and mind. Take your time; don't worry so much about being with a guy. You still have your whole life ahead.

Believe me, now in college, I have grown so much in every way possible. I have about 5 guys - no lie - who like me. They respect me and see me as an intelligent, sincere, and insightful woman.

So let me know how this works out. Take care and good luck. Remember, no rush...You can't change the past.


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February & March Magazine Issues

March 15, 2012

The February and March issues of Sweet Designs Magazine are now online, featuring a combined 53 new articles and features!!

- Cover: Stephanie Lynn reflects on 5 years
- Cover: India (of Darn-licious knitwear)
- Life in the dumps (moving in with my bf)
- The difference between men and women
- Angels among us (parts 1 and 2)
- Arts graduates & the dark night of the soul
- Triple threat (how I survived my teen yrs)
- Dating isn't easy (my true story)
- How to turn not-so-great gifts ... (fashion)
- Ten reasons to love being single
- Taking the big leap (college)
- Valentine's Day (not what you'd expect!)
- The last of the cold (hopefully) (fashion)
- A month full of love
- Ten tips for successful airline travel
- Reasons I love writing for SDM
- Who needs love?
- They're not all the same
- The life I'm glad I don't have (fiction)
- Professional dress/ finding Fendi (fashion)
- An airport anniversary: a true story
- Inappropriate Facebook photos
- The perks of a big city (college)
- A night(mare) to forget (part 2)
- The Anita Blake series (book review)
- Saving June by Hannah Harrington (book)
- Under the Mesquite by GG McCall (book)
- The Lullaby by Sarah Dessen (book)
- If I Stay by Gayle Foreman (book review)
- My sweetheart (original poetry)
- Isn't it funny (original poetry)
- The stranger (original poetry)
- A winter wonderland (original poetry)
- One night valentine
- The thick envelopes (college acceptance)
- Southern love
- Healthy hair and vitamins
- It's a date (dating idea alternatives)
- The 30 hour famine
- School's out forever!
- Marching right back into spring? (fashion)
- Dear John
- When TV shows depict your life
- 3 Fun ways to rock spring's hottest trends
- Neglected teeth
- Starting something new
- Guy movies
- To hesitate or dive in?
- Deadly, by Julie Chibbaro (book review)
- Beastly, by Alex Flinn (book review)
- I don't care (poetry)
- Together, alone (poetry)

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