All My Friends Have Boyfriends
By Brittany, age 20, Tennessee
All my other friends have boyfriends. I feel a bit left out, but I'm just not ready for one. What should I do?Emma, 12
Emma,
Having a boyfriend seems to be the "it" thing at that age, but I can assure you, it's not. I know your friends might even pressure you into having one, but do what you do. Be happy for you. Don't live to please everyone else, even your friends, or you'll wind up miserable. Now is the time to still enjoy whatever kid you have left in you, if any, because once you get to be my age, it's gone pretty fast. I look back on how boy crazy I was and wish things would have worked out differently, and I hadn't been so obsessed with having some little crush. But, regardless of your choice, life goes on, and you'll wind up happy either way. :) You seem like a strong enough girl to just look over this and be yourself. Good luck!
Brittany
* * * * *
Okay, so there is this guy, my boyfriend. We have been dating for almost five months. He's sweet and everything, but sometimes I feel like he likes someone else. He told me he had feelings for other girls, but then he said he doesn't anymore. He tells me other girls are prettier than me (not what a boyfriend should do), then he says he was just kidding. When he tells me he loves me I don't know if I should believe him or not because of everything he says and does. Why is he like this? What should I do? Break up with him?
Heather, 14
Heather,
I've been in almost the exact position you are in, coincidentally. I know what it's like to be told things like that, and it's definitely not a fun thing to go through at all. However, have you tried talking to him about this? If you haven't, maybe he's just honestly not aware that when he says those things to you or when he does those things, that he's hurting you. When they tell you "some things are better left unsaid," they're not kidding. But, if you want to see the positive side to this, at least he's being honest. Although, him being too honest, has obviously made you somewhat paranoid, so do talk to him. If you have talked to him and there's not a change and he doesn't really care, I'd see it best to move on. You deserve better than that and not a guy who will bring you down to make you feel inferior to other girls, because no one should be told by the guy who loves them that they're uglier than other girls. They should be convinced they're the most beautiful girl in the world because every girl is in her own way. I believe you're so beautiful, and even though it doesn't mean the same coming from a stranger as it does from the boy you love, maybe it will at least put a smile on your face.
This is the best advice I have. I hope things get better for you.
Brittany
* * * * *
I have been dating this guy for a month, and I am absolutely in love with him. And he supposedly loved me. For Valentine's Day, he got me something, and told me he loved me, but within the same week, he told all of my friends that he wanted us to be just friends and that I was too clingy, so he was going to break up with me. I don't understand what happened! It all happened within three days or so. I'm so confused! What could have happened? Please help me - I need it so much.
Sara, 13
Sara,
Have you tried talking to him? I mean, it seems really weird that he did that, without notice and out of the blue. I would be just as confused as you, but the best thing I know to do is ask him. If he can't or won't answer, you deserve better anyway. After all, you're only 13. There's plenty of time to find a guy who will treat you way better than this random guy who can't decide what his feelings are for you.
Brittany