Death: A Difficult Goodbye
By Alisha, age 22, Massachusetts
My uncle Carl was diagnosed with cancer throughout all his insides five weeks before he died on June 26th, 2010. It was one of the hardest deaths to ever hit my family. He didn't receive any chemo because the doctors told him that it would only give him about 5-8 months longer to live. He told us that if it were to give him 3-5 years longer to live, he would have done it in a heartbeat. He was only 52 years old at the time of his death and was only a few short weeks from his birthday.
He left behind his wife, 2 grown sons, 7 grandchildren, 8 nieces and nephews, 3 brothers, and 2 sisters, as he lives in heaven relieved from his sickness. For those five weeks, I would sit with him Monday through Friday from 8 am till noon and be there to help him out when he needed something. It was a hard thing to do at first, but in some ways it got easier. I can remember what I said to him the Friday before he passed away. I told him that I would see him on Monday. He died the next morning, Saturday, June 26th at 1 am.
It just so happened that a group of friends and I were just ending our week of a Christian outreach called Superkids. It's an outreach for kids to come and learn about God in different ways, such as skits, Bible groups, memory verses, etc. That Friday, ending the Superkids week, was my uncle's funeral. The Superkids Team became a support system for myself as well as my sister.
Only days before he passed away, I had written a poem that I wanted to read at his funeral, but I was scared and bawling my eyes out, so reading this poem wouldn't have made any sense to the attendees of the funeral. The poem is called "True." It goes something like this:
True
My uncle
Was a man of few words.
In the short 21 years of my life,
I grew to love him.
When I was younger,
I saw him a lot,
From Thanksgiving get-togethers
To small family visits.
As my teenage years rolled around
Those "a lot" occasions
Became fewer and fewer.
I can remember our family trip
To Washington D.C.
What a trip that was!
A tour of the Pentagon
And a walk through Arlington Cemetery.
Where Uncle Carl, Aunt Tina and I
Fell back behind the rest
Because of dehydration and the heat.
The last Thanksgiving
I remember seeing him at
Was Thanksgiving 2009
At my house.
After that
I would see him every so often
Only if he stopped by my house,
But overall
I saw the love
He had for his family,
Although a stubborn yet caring man,
He loved us all.
He was a husband,
A father of 2 sons,
A grandfather to 7,
A brother to 5,
A son,
And an uncle to 8.
There's a line from the song
"Graduation" by Vitamin C.
Although a song about graduation,
The chorus says a lot:
"As we go on
We remember
All the times we
Had together,
And as our lives change
From whatever
We will still be
Friends forever."
I love you
Uncle Carl
Always & Forever
July 18th, 1956
To
June 26th, 2010
