From the Journal of the Girl You Called 'Fat'
By Roe, age 17, Oman
Trends change all around, but some things never do. For example, the top issues for girls will probably always be beauty and weight consciousness. When the above-average person hears this, we discard it saying: "Where do these people leave their self esteem? Why do they care what people think?"Six months ago, I was one of those people.
And then something made me change my view. I'm including it here - a journal entry of the girl who's weight conscious - in the hopes that maybe it will change yours too.
For obvious reasons, I'm not including her name or any sort of identity, but it's enough for you to know that she is as real as you and me. And that if you knew her, you'd never guess it was she that wrote this.
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7th July, 20--
I guess one of the biggest questions of all time is: Where do girls with self esteem issues come from? Why do they care about things people say to them? Well, I'll tell you why - with the help of a story. My story.
There was once this girl, and she had everything a girl could ask for. She got straight A's without trying. She was a beautiful girl, a commendable athlete, and an inspiring speaker. She was popular, and people looked up to her. And she was never conscious about her looks. Life was great.
And then she got fat. Just slightly, but there you are.
Her parents told her she looked fat and ugly. They did this because they loved her - because (ironically) they didn't want people to call her fat. They told it to her all the time. For a long time, she resisted. She faced people with defiance because she didn't believe she was actually fat. A couple pounds didn't do that.
But then, slowly, people she cared about started telling her she was fat too. Now she didn't want to be 'thin,' but she didn't want to hear people anymore either. So she ate food in the night when her parents were asleep. She was, by nature, defiant, so she stuffed herself. She would start eating crisps, and then she couldn't stop. And then she'd feel guilty. She skipped meals, or ate cereal for dinner, ignoring the mouth watering dishes on the table. She started working out - until all she wanted was to become thin.
I'm not prolonging the story. Inwardly, she hated herself for giving in. Outwardly, she hated others for making her. She became bitter. She would be rude for no reason at all, and found that she didn't care so much after all. People started calling her arrogant. She dropped co-curricular activities, and her grades too.
And then one day she looked at herself in the mirror - and she didn't like what she saw. And she cried and cried with the knowledge that today she was exactly what she never wanted to be - just like everybody else.
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So to all of you people out there - the next time you casually make fun of a fat person - on the street, in school, or in a newspaper, remember: you don't know anything about them. One 'casual' comment of yours could stomp on their heart, shatter their self esteem, and batter their confidence. Remember: they're just one more person trying to fit in. And most of all, never forget: It could have been you. In fact, it could still be.
