By Emily, age 19, Newfoundland
Sweet Designs Featured Writer
They say that cheaters never win and winners never cheat. I guess, in my case, that could be true.
Once upon a time, I was dating a guy named Jacob. We met on the school bus while I was dating another guy. We'd been talking, and he always seemed nice enough, and he always treated me really well. One day someone told me that he was flirting with me, and I was so flattered.
After the guy that I had been dating broke it off with me, I was really upset, and Jacob held my hand the entire ride home, telling me it was all going to be okay.
He asked me to the Homecoming dance and I accepted. He told me once I got there that he didn't have time to get me roses and that he was very sorry. That Monday, however, he gave me the prettiest bouquet of red roses. It came with a card filled with rose petals, and he asked me to be his girlfriend. It was all so very romantic.
So we became a couple and he treated me really well. He brought me cookies one day and always made sure to hold my hand. He always wrote me letters so I'd have something to read during the day.
About two weeks into our relationship I got a phone call from a mutual friend of ours. She told me that Jacob had been seeing someone else. She didn't know I existed until my source told her. Apparently the girl was pretty shocked. I wasn't sure if I should believe her or not, but I kept my guard up for the next few days.
Three days after the phone call my source produced a letter he had written to the girl after she confronted him about it. I knew it was his handwriting, and I had every reason not to believe him now.
Thinking back on it now, I don't know if he knew that I knew, but he was pretty miserable that day. I didn't confront him; I didn't even mention that I knew. I simply told him that it was over and that was the end of it. I was moving the next week, and even if I wasn't, I probably still wouldn't have cared. But it was the last time I ever saw him.
I know I was lucky that it was early on in whatever we had. I was also pretty lucky that I was moving the next week, or things could have gotten ugly between the two of us. He was a self-proclaimed grudge holder and he looked pretty angry the day I broke it off with him.
Hopefully you will never have to use this, but my best advice for you ladies is this:
♥ Generally, the rule is: Once a cheater, always a cheater. Don't take him back because he's likely to do it again.
♥ If you're the mistress, break it off. Younger readers: If he does break it off with his other girl for you, then who's to say that he won't do the same to you? Older readers: Chances are he's not going to leave her for you, especially if he's married. And really, would you want someone doing it to you?
♥ If he cheats on you, get over him and don't hold a grudge. He probably doesn't care if you're mad at him. Don't let him have that control.
For all of you ladies who haven't had this happen to you (and I hope there's lots of you), don't be scared. Don't let horror stories turn you into a man hater. There are some good guys out there just waiting to be found! But be careful.
Here are some signs of possible cheating to look for:
♥ Changes in behavior (For example, he becomes distant, doesn't look you in the eyes, etc.)
♥ He starts "working" a lot more than usual.
♥ He constantly accuses you of cheating.
♥ He receives odd phone calls or texts from people he's sketchy on giving details about.
Don't get carried away with this list, however. If he starts acting strange, remember, something else might be causing it. With cheaters usually more than one of these signs happens, and they usually happen all at once. Ask him if something's wrong. Don't jump to conclusions, or he might think you're cheating on him.