Kicking Addiction
By Emily, age 20, Newfoundland
Sweet Designs Featured Writer
For a couple of years, starving myself was a very big addiction for me because all I wanted was to be thin. I felt strong and powerful when I hadn't eaten in 24 hours or when I could just give some cookies away to someone else. But for these couple of years I was also a wreck. It took a long time, but I believe that I've finally overcome my starving addiction. Here are my tips for you to drop such an addiction.
First of all, I was highly involved in the Eating Disorder Communities that I wrote about in the August '08 issue. I had a blog on Xanga dedicated to my calorie counting and how much exercise I was getting. All of these girls around me on this site also had the same addiction that I did. I had to delete the site because I associated it with starving.
Next, I had to stop looking at the calorie labels for food. You see, to me, 500 calories seemed like a lot to have in the span of a day, so any food with over 100-200 calories was a big no-no. Also, I had to force myself to stop eating a lot vegetables and drinking liquids in the place of meals. Vegetables are a great side for a meal, but they don't make very good meals by themselves.
Next, even though it was good for me, I had to stop working out so much. At one point in my addiction, I worked out 2 hours a day, 5 days a week, having eaten little or nothing beforehand. I cut my cardio down to 40 minutes to 1 hour per day and did some stretches and crunches and stuff.
It was really difficult to watch as I gained weight back, but I felt healthier and I wasn't so miserable anymore. My days weren't consumed by the number of calories I'd eaten that day.
I still record what I eat every day, but I don't record the number of calories I've burned or have eaten. I'm also on Slimquick, green tea, apple cider vinegar and calcium pills to help me take off the gross amount of weight I've put on since college residence. To be frank, I don't think that my eating habits or my relationship with food will ever be healthy because of my family's history with eating disorders, but I'm trying my very best to do these things in moderation.