By Stephanie Lynn
Choosing the Right Swimsuit
It's really hard to find a swimsuit. I'm not really built like the girl next door. My upper body is a bit bigger than most girls my age, and I don't really feel too confident showing my stomach. Please help. Thanks.
The best idea I have for you would be a full piece, with maybe a ribbon, bow, tie, or belt to break your upper body from your waist, divide the two, and draw attention to your face!! Always play up your face - it's the best feature any girl has! Always be confident about your body, and always remember that beautiful girls come in all shapes, sizes and colors. But the really beautiful ones are the ones who are confident enough to admit that!
P.S. Also, maybe try a tankini!
Looking in the Mirror I Don't See Pretty
I didn't know really how to classify this because I have a couple things to say. I have really awesome friends and I love them to death. But I really want a boyfriend. The thing is, all my friends are drop-dead gorgeous, and I'm a fat kid who can barely pass as decent looking. They all tell me "You're gorgeous! The guys should be falling all over you!" It feels like they're lying to me, because I look at myself and don't see anything remotely pretty. I can't talk to them about it because they always say, "Oh, you're pretty! Believe it, please!" and I never know if it's true. What should I do? I know this sounds like a self-centered little kid who has low self-esteem, but I really don't know what to do.
Your friends are right. All girls are pretty ... remember that. Beautiful women come in all shapes, sizes and colors. But you know what really makes a women beautiful? It's her confidence. That's the one thing you seem to lack. It doesn't matter what you look like. You always have to be confident and know that you are pretty. I bet there are a bunch of guys out there right now who would love to ask you out.
If you're really that worried about your weight, then you should talk to your mother about setting you up on a diet and exercise plan. But honestly I'm sure you'll be just as pretty if you were 20 lbs. lighter or heavier, because size doesn't matter - it's all in yourself. It doesn't matter what anyone thinks - you need to do what makes you happy. Remember these things when you wake up in the morning, You're beautiful, you're smart, you are yourself, and you're confident and proud of who you are.
Body Image Issues
OK, so I know I'm really young and stuff, but I really need help! I have a really low self-esteem problem. I don't think I'm skinny enough I weigh 43 kg [94.6 lbs]. I don't think I'm pretty enough. Quite a few people at school have told me that before. I don't have anyone to talk through these problems with. I feel like a BIG loser ... plus one of the guys I have a crush on likes my BEST FRIEND!! I am sooo depressed. I know this sounds a bit silly, coming from an 11 year old and all, but I would really like some advice. I don't want to talk to a school teacher or anything. Thank you so much for reading this!
Everyone has self-esteem issues at one point in their life. 95 pounds is a very healthy weight for a girl your age. Depression is very possible for someone at the age of 11. It is not silly at all. Yasmin, everyone and I mean everyone, is beautiful in their own way. Don't let anyone tell you that you are not beautiful. One thing you can do for yourself every night is write in a notepad or journal one thing you love about yourself. It makes it easier to do if you start from head to toe.
About that boy liking your best friend ... Don't worry about him. There are so many other boys out there. I bet in 2 years you'll wonder why you ever even liked this guy. And one last thing, if you ever find yourself wanting to cut or commit suicide from this depression you are feeling, please tell a parent, a trusted adult, a counselor, or a school teacher, even though you said you wouldn't like to talk to one. I tell you to do this because you may be suffering from depression and need to talk to a therapist. I hope you feel better about yourself soon, Yasmin.
I've been pretty down and depressed lately. I'm not even sure why, but all my friends have noticed, and my boyfriend has noticed as well. I mean, there are a few troubles and things I've been thinking about, but I try and put those away by writing them down. I'm just not really sure what to do.
I kind of have been wanting to lose weight as well. I mean, I'm not fat or anything. It's just that I want to feel more fit. Plus I've been wanting to pump up my fashion choices a little more, but I don't have much money or much time to do so.
I definitely know how you feel! Last year I was doing exactly the same thing as you! I was very depressed. I even thought of committing suicide. I was thinking that because of my weight too. I'm petite ... so when I gained pounds I felt gymongo!
How I got over it involved sort of religious reasons, and also my boyfriend and friends helped me out too. This is what I did, and recommend you do:
I went to church. God helped me through this, and I know he already has a solution for you :]]
I talked to my friends. Your friends noticed that you were feeling down. Maybe you should ask them to help you ... maybe going to do fun things, like the movies, to clear your mind!
I talked to my family. They love me, and I bet yours does too. They will be there for everything. That made me feel better.
Lastly, I talked to myself. I know how you feel ... sorta left out. What I did is I decided to get off Myspace for a little while, and I also wrote down my feelings. It helped a lot! :]
And also, about the clothes, I felt the same exact thing. I wanted more and more and more of those things. But like you, I just don't have the money! So I went with the clothing that I had, and I went to my local art supply store and bought a Bedazzler :P It makes my clothes feel cool. Now I feel fine.
I truly hope I helped you! I'll keep you in my prayers :]